VERONICA KUFFEL

JUNE 1 – JUNE 10

“All The Faces” – Creed Bratton, 2003

Honestly, pretty Coarsegold is a solid album

With life pulling me toward the Midwest, I decided it was time to leave Arizona. I said my goodbyes to family and coworkers and set out on another van trip back to Minnesota.

I had this idea, to sum up my adventure in Arizona through a video. I called it, “a desert baker.” It acknowledges my time in the desert with somewhat of a dad joke.

But when I first came here, I thought I would only stay a few months. I thought, with all the cute bakeries around Tucson, I would become a baker for a bit before moving on. That didn’t pan out.

Then I thought, hey, the different steps to baking would make good segments for a video, and I could use it as a medium to summarize what I came up with and learned in Arizona.

I never found the time to actually sit down and film myself baking, though I did spend a fair bit in the kitchen. So I thought, hey, if I can’t make a video about it, I might as well write it. Here is my time in Arizona, summarized in baking dessert bread. You know, for the joke.

STEP 1: MIXING INGREDIENTS – NOVEMBER

My first weeks in Arizona were set aside for exploration. My uncle and his family let me stay with them–I had food, a roof over my head and a whole new set of siblings.

I was hungry for everything: the desert, the mountains, the university, the eccentric town strips of Tucson and especially the Mexican food.

These were the initial ingredients of what I thought were only a few months in Arizona, just the base of an adventure throughout the West.

The recipe changed countless times. Luckily with bread, you only need a few base ingredients, so regardless of how many times you mess up, it’s easy to start a new recipe.

STEP 2: KNEADING THE DOUGH – DECEMBER-JANUARY

I tossed flour on the table–a few freelance articles and brickwork at my family’s new house. I maybe sprinkled in 200 job applications of sugar for first seasonal and then career work. I know, I splurged a little.

Then, I kneaded the dough and got to work; the initial plan, to find seasonal work in the West. When that didn’t work, a career job in Colorado. When that didn’t work, I ran out of money. I massaged hours of work and anxiety to try and make my plans, well, work.

When something didn’t come together, when the dough got tougher, I tried a new angle and pressed forward. That dough, however, was pretty tough.

Eventually, I worked out the bread into a nice round and sugary ball. I decided to stay in Arizona. My idea to be a baker turned into an idea to progress my writing career. I took a job as a reporter and the recipe was chosen.

STEP 4: LETTING IT SIT – FEBRUARY-APRIL

I adjusted to my new phase of life as a journalist in Tucson, and I was so happy. I settled into the drive to and from work with a handful of events in between. I got to meet some amazing people in the industry and learn the inner workings of a local news media company.

I met some lifelong colleagues and friends that I hope to maintain throughout the years. I never thought I’d enjoy in-person work, I just thought I would tolerate it. But this job truly changed my perspective on both office culture and overall news writing.

Between my weeks, I spent time exploring the region with or without my family. Anni and I went on wonderful adventures, some including sleds and snow in the mountains, delicious authentic Mexican food and even Old Western towns.

My stomach was rightfully happy with all of the fantastic cuisine, especially that of my aunt’s cooking. Overall, I climbed literal and metaphoric mountains in my time in Tucson. It was maybe a place I could let myself sit forever.

STEP 5: BAKING – MAY

But as the months drew on, so did the heat. I missed the green and the water I grew up with, and as the city started to boil, so did my thoughts of the future.

It seemed I was pulled in two different directions, that of a toasty, lifelong adventure in the Southwest and that of a continued mobile escapade throughout the country and world. With the second, I’d have some pretty remarkable company by my side.

By the end of May, I decided it was time for me to move on (before I burned to a crisp. Can’t keep dough in the oven too long).

I opened the great heavy door of this oven we call a state and heaved out my… future? Potential? Wait… what exactly is the bread in this metaphor?

Sorry, dessert bread. I have to keep the climate joke going.

STEP 6: ENJOYING THE BREAD – JUNE

So here I am, packing up my office space and guest room with this hunk of baked sugary gluten on my table. What is it supposed to be in all of this? In a more literal sense, what did I create in my time here? What did I produce?

I feel like at face value, I built a better foundation for my career. I climbed mountains, discovered the desert and met a fantastic slew of people along the way.

I could get cheesy and say I learned a thing or two about myself, but this isn’t cheese bread. This is a sugar loaf. Besides, it’s kind of implied.

For the most part, I started to realize the impact of hustle culture, how moving fast to get a job, a home and a life isn’t just “settling.” When people get those things, they’re not done with adventures. Especially in your twenties.

If anything, this adventure out West helped put it all into perspective. It’s okay that it’s not all figured out. It’s okay that I haven’t settled yet. And it’s okay that my plans for the future change on a dime (sometimes, even a penny).

As I packed up the rest of the life I built in Tucson, I chomped on my tough, burnt loaf and reminisced on the fun I had. At times, it was scary, mind-opening, even surprising. But it was all well worth it.

I admit, I’ll still be chewing on this sugar bread after I leave Arizona. Next time you see me, don’t be surprised if I’ve got crumbs all over my shirt. I’m “reminiscing.” I’m enjoying my desert.’